The New Worst Food.

So I lied about what the worst food was.  I tend to do that.  What, you trusted someone whose blog o’ hate has generated all of 10 inspired comments, 7 from the same user?  Idiot.  You’re exactly the kind of person who would be eating this item of food, which is clearly the worst (arguably) edible product to ever see the back of a (undoubtedly foreign) grocery store shelf.

The Worst Jobs Ever.

What’s the one common thread that links all jobs?  Oh yeah, they suck.  But chances are, your job isn’t the worst job out there.  Not even close.  You might have the worst boss, or the worst co-worker, but you sure as hell have nothing to complain about compared to some of the jobs – past and present – that humans have had to endure.  Check out these jobs, most as suggested by worst-jobs.com:

The Worst Movie Translations.

In the context of cinema, much gets lost in translation across cultures.  While the phrase “kicking ass plays everywhere” holds true for action flicks, most dramatic films lose meaning when viewed outside of the context of their original culture.  Because of this, some Chinese distributors have decided to aptly rename several American films to better convey the implications of American film titles.

Okay, maybe too aptly.  See if you can guess what the “American” title is after reading its Chinese translation.

The Worst Cover of an MIA Track.

Is it really possible to poorly cover a song originally by a marginally-talented artist who only enjoys success because she married into high production values?  Duh.  An acoustic cover of MIA would be bad enough, but when you break out the ukele, everything starts going south of “suck.”  And fast.

The Worst News Mishaps.

It might come as a shock to most of us, but newscasters are human.  Though they display the chiseled faces of porcelain demi-gods and speak with the eloquence of the smartest person at a Victorian-era cocktail party, they are just as prone to mistakes as you or me.  And, it turns out when they happen, it’s pretty damn funny.  For all of us!

The Worst Cover of a Ludacris Track.

Kids.  One day they’re arguing about whether Wolverine could beat up Scorpion, the next day they’re covering a Ludacris track for a live studio audience.  They just grow up so damn fast!  Unfortunately for our friend Oliver, the result of said maturation is not a good thing.  Haha, maturation.

The Worst Movie Scenes.

Have you ever watched a movie, and found yourself thinking of a specific scene days after your cinematic experience?  Well, that’s not always a good thing.  Here’s a look at some of those scenes so bad, or otherwise “out there”, that you’ll likely take them to your deathbed.

The Worst Living Creatures on Earth.

Sometimes you just have to ask of your respective Creator: what the shit were you thinking, dude?  Here’s a list of the worst living creatures on Earth.

The Worst Commercials.

There are a litany of perspectives in the world of advertising.  Marketing directors face a plethora of decisions on a daily basis regarding the direction their advertising campaign should take.  Should it be funny?  Should it be poignant?  Should it be expensive?

Good marketing teams answer these questions in a way that satisfies their employers and advances the agenda of the goods or services being promoted.  Bad marketing teams come up with this kind of shit.

The Worst Movies of 2008.

I realize we just had the Academy Awards to honor the best movies of 2008, but the Razzies just don’t get any publicity.  So TTATWT has taken it upon itself to list the worst movies of 2008, so that you might appreciate the 2009 year-in-film just a little bit more (unless, of course, it sucks too.)